The Waters

Jesus walks with us through the storms of life. Sometimes we feel His presence and then sometimes when we may not. But it doesn’t mean He is not with us; and it doesn’t mean we are alone through the storm. We may be at our weakest, but He is our strengthener. What a comforting thought that we don’t have to go through this life alone because He is with us every step and every moment in our lives. We serve an amazing God who loves us so much even when we fail Him.

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The Journey…

IMG_0866The journey…

We live in a brief earthly existence. An existence that requires Jesus. When contemplating on the word “brief,” that word alone can be depressing. I am speaking for myself because I have had moments when in deep thought how brief life can be. I know it surely makes me think the briefness of life and how scary it can become when I am no longer walking on this earth.  But the reality is that there is eternal life with HIM. At some point in our lives, we must surrender and accept Jesus as our Savior.  Having to do life without Jesus is impossible for me now. My life without Him is completely meaningless and senseless. Life with Him is true living.

We live in a world of sin, messiness, brokenness, sickness, but know this- we are not alone because Jesus is walking right beside us through it all… the good and the not so good. HE is holding our hand made of flesh and bone and that itself is a comforting thought to know. To be held by hands where nails were once driven through, and bleed for our sake. A selfless act of love… who would refuse the privilege of holding His hand. We are not facing life alone because He promised that He would never leave us nor forsake us. His promised word is engraved and set on our hearts. And, He lights the fire for us when we finally give our lives to Him. Jesus just waits patiently. Having patience is not easy for the mere human. Imagine Jesus having patience beyond our comprehension… that’s pretty amazing.

It has now been five years when I gave my life to Jesus. Sometimes I wish I knew Him in those past years in the way I know Him now. Even though there is so much more to know of His character, He continues to love me just the same. It’s definitely an ongoing process knowing more of Him.

In all those years prior in which I lived floating through the motions of living a life without Him, I knew nothing. But with Him, I know something and that is, to have a utmost desire to spend eternity with Him.

In all my academic years, I attended private schools where I was exposed in learning about God. Little did I know that it takes a relationship with Him to really know Him at a deeper level and the most intimate one at that. Well, it had to take a trial- out of all the trials that I faced in my life, this one that I was facing at the time was about to break me to pieces and burn. To break me in ways that I never imagined it would break me. I was utterly broken and in the deepest despair. It broke me into small fragments where I found myself so very desperate… up to a point that I wanted to literally stop breathing in life. I cried with so much emotion. And yet, the only solution I came to was to stop living. The enemy had a pretty good grip of my life. He laughed at me and made me believe I was worthless and that no-one and God could ever love me the way I needed to be loved.

Where everyone I imagined would  finally convince me to move on with life, did not work. Where counseling failed because I still chose to do things my way. I finally came to the conclusion, it being my last resort … to surrender to Jesus and accept Him as my Savior.

Even though I would have conversations with Him, go to church and spend time in solitude and other things that I thought were solutions, I finally fell on my knees and cried out so hard that I was short of breath and asked Him with my final cry to help me. The cries for help that meant for me to live or die.

Unfortunately, it had to take a trial in my life to realize that I needed saving by the only One who can save. I realized that I needed Him at the age of 41. I wanted to knock myself out for wasting most of my life not knowing Him sooner. Thinking of the age I was at… I felt regret that I didn’t have a relationship with Him sooner. But in His goodness, it doesn’t matter to Him where we are in life, or the age we are at. He doesn’t discriminate. What matters most is that we come to realize that we need saving by the one and only true God- King Jesus. If only we allow Him to invade our hearts with His love, and willing to give our lives to Him…then things will change for us. We will began walking in a different light- His loving light.

Our lives will not be perfect because we will still have the not so good days or encounter displeasing situations. Know this…we are not facing it alone. He is right there with us whether we feel His presence or not. We have a perfect God who understands us, knows us and loves us so very much. We are His imperfect children, yet He loves us all the same. When we allow His love to pour into our fragile hearts then our hearts will overflow with His unconditional love. His love is the greatest of all. Take His heart and let Him take yours.

Remember, this journey that we walk is one that is traveled with Jesus by our side. Thank Jesus because He has you in His embrace.

Thorns…

thorns     Thorns… sharp points that prick the skin causing blood to emerge from the inside. Thorns that puncture, penetrate, break, scratch, infect and bleed.

When I see this photo of thorns that were pruned from my rosebush, I cannot help to think of the crown of thorns that was placed on Jesus’ head on the day of His death. I cannot help to get emotional… thinking of the pain inflicted upon Him and what He endured for us. He endured it all for us because we are worthy of His everlasting love.

I can recall a day when I stepped on thorns. It was a pain that I could not endure. The thorn that penetrated through the fabric of my shoe; and brought tears to my eyes because it hurt so much. It is definitely one thing I try to avoid and prevent from happening or experiencing ever again.

Imagine a crown of thorns that was placed on the head of Jesus. But that one crown of thorns gave us life through Him. And one day He will crown us with life, but a crown of beauty that brings eternity.

Jesus gave up His life for us… a selfless sacrifice, a sign of His love and an act of who He is… the King of the world. Through His sacrifice and the shedding of His blood, He gave us life and poured real love.

The One and Only…

 

 

IMG_1211I often wonder at times if there is any one in this existence that could love me as Jesus does…unconditionally, faithfully, never-changing, and never-ending.

He is the perfect God. He is the perfect being. He is the perfect man.

He is not temporal. He is eternal. He is available. He does not remind us of our faults. He forgets and forgives. He does not love based on conditions. He loves unconditionally. He listens. He does not walk away nor does He slam the door in your face and shatter your heart to pieces. His words are true. He does not break His promises. He means what He says.

I contemplate if there could be anyone like Jesus in this earthly existence. My negative thoughts wander and swim in my mind that I’m better off on my own, and just staying in my solitude-without someone to love me in the ways I desire to be loved… besides they all break their promises. But then, I am reminded that there is someone for everyone. The Lord has someone very special, molded just for me. So it’s a matter of waiting and not rushing the process, and of course, it’s all in His timing.  I must wait for the very best… His Best- Jesus’ best. It is in God’s timetable because His timing is perfect. When the time arrives, where that special person walks into my life and I in his, we will know.  And, he and I will know that God is the One and Only.  Because if He loves Jesus first and more than he loves me,  I’ll know he will love me as Jesus does.

His name is Jesus…

IMG_2862The cross has great significance in which a man of flesh, not any man, but Jesus- who hung and bled, took His last breath until His death.

A man of flesh who received and endured all the pain that was stricken-physically and verbally to Him.

A man who cried out His last tears before He entered His kingdom.

It breaks my heart to know of all that Jesus endured for us, sinners by nature.

5,480 blows… Arrested as if a criminal, a man of innocence.

Carried the weight of the cross on His back, just as man carries the world on His back.

Ridiculed.

Rejected.

Mocked.

Cursed.

Insulted.

Persecuted.

Condemned.

Crowned with thorns, now He is crowned with life.

Lanced.

Spat on.

Beaten.

Whipped.

Pushed.

Nailed.

Pulled-dislocated bones.

Stripped.

Hung on the cross for six hours.

Broken.

Died…

And He did it all for love.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The beauty within…

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Who knows us better than we know ourselves, or in that matter, than anyone else who resides on this earth- but God Himself. He is the One who shaped and built us with His hands and who has our name engraved on His palms. The One who created us by every cell, every fiber and every particle.  This exquisite being of the human flesh in which He has intertwined and knitted us together to be His masterpiece and His beauty. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder-His name is Jesus… who views us through a clear lens. He is the only One who can love us unconditionally, whole-hearted and unlimitedly. His love that we feel now from Him is only a fragment of it. Can you imagine how much more love we would feel once we see his beautiful face in heaven? Surely breathtaking. When He calls us home, the last breath taken on earth that signifies the end of life at the physical form, surely will  not be the end of life. When we meet Him at the gates, there we will breathe again. And He will breathe life into us so that it make us whole again. So, this One God that we know, the only One who makes all things possible, is the One we must give glory to and give our never-ending love too—Jesus Christ himself. He doesn’t look at us as people do, He looks at our hearts. He wants to claim our hearts. It doesn’t matter where we came from, what we look like, what we can or cannot do, where we are at the moment; He loves us because we are flawlessly beautiful in His eyes, and that’s a big deal. It’s huge that God loves us just as we are regardless of our sinful nature. He brings life, beauty and love. Lord, let me continue to be someone who is after your heart and in pursuit of you.

A Life Worth Living…

 

IMG_1617When we are faced with difficult times that knocks us down to our knees-crying out for help, crawling into an empty space, and into a fetal position, know that when we call out to the only one who comforts, understands and out-pours His love… is the one who never leaves us even when we may feel His silence; and question Him in ways that bring doubt and hopelessness.

Yesterday, while dining out with family, a woman approached us after listening to our conversation with an employee at the restaurant. After conversing about God and faith in God with the employee, this other woman who approached us began sharing her testimony how she suffered from an enduring pain that became life-threatening due to a serious infection. She spoke about how God healed her; and that it was a time in her life where the pain broke her in ways in which she contemplated on thoughts of ending her life. Ending her life-killing oneself.  God was the One who spoke to her and who gave her hope.

While listening to her testimony, I had flashbacks of the lowest time in my life in 2013 where I too wanted to end my life because I could not deal with the pain anymore. The pain from rejection … rejection after rejection from men who claimed to love me and would never leave me.

After my rescuing by God, I came to the realization that God is true with His promises. It is God who loves and will never leave us.

A rejection that was the final draw for me that had me thinking that my life was not worth living anymore. I thought it was the solution for my pain.  When crawled into a ball, fetal position, crying my eyes and heart out to God, He spoke and embraced me with an overwhelming peace that now I cried for a different reason because I felt His presence, peace and love. It was the Prince of Peace who saved me. It was He who found me and I who found Him.

So, friends, when you feel at your lowest, darkest,  most broken and most desperate, turn to Jesus because He is the only one who can bring us out of darkness; and walking into His light. That was the day when He saved me. It is a life worth living when we know that He loves us so much that if He had to shed His blood on the cross once more, He would do it in a heartbeat—that’s love from the only one who knows how to love us.

You have my heart…

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This fragile, human heart that is chambered within my chest is one heart that beats in your love.

A love that is everlasting, always enduring and yearning for more of your love.

A love that sweeps me off my feet.

A love that covers me as if I was sitting in front of a warm fireplace, where heat is penetrating through my skin and burning through my soul.

A love that smiles down on me as the sunlight shines upon me; a light that is warm, bright and consuming.

A love that is beautiful, innocent, stainless, pure, and without blemish.

Lord, you carry me in your arms, softly whispering to me how much you love me and that you will never leave me.

Your love is the greatest and the purest of all. Consume and have all my heart.

Allow me to submerge and drown in your love in the depths of the ocean, your ocean of love, finding myself seeking more of your love.

A love that is endless and unbearable, where my heart expands and ignites the life and fire within.

I belong to you, my heart belongs to you and all my love belongs to you. You are the greatest of my love and the only love that will see me through in this life that I live because I live for you.

One more try…

IMG_2134Walking in fear at times not knowing what is ahead of me. Guessing I’m too comfortable in my net of safety. Every day is a constant battle fighting and slaying my giants… the fear to love another, the fear to step into faith where God may be calling me to , the fear of letting go of my comforts and in stepping out of the zone. When thinking of all my struggles, it brings tears to my eyes with droplets of sadness and joy, tasting the salt with my lips and crying out to Jesus- questioning why and when. But I know the Lord is with me every step that I take, and it’s okay that I don’t fully understand where He is leading me even though, at times I get frustrated and lose trust in Him. But I know He will reveal to me when the time is right… according to His will. It’s always His will and His way. Lord, only you know my heart and only you can love me as no other being . But I also know that love exist when you exist…truly exist in one’s heart.  Lord , you always give one more try on us- never giving up on us -never turning your face from us- never failing us. With you, one more try is constant and infinite. Afraid to love, the fear of getting hurt, the fear of getting rejected and abandoned . But knowing that you are there where before I didn’t know your presence existed that is until the day you found me in my darkest time and sadness time. Lord, you are love, grace and beauty that fulfills me constantly. When the time is right, I am ready because I know you are preparing me for something great … a love that you made special for me where before no-one could give me on this temporary world.

Passionate God…

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Every morning is a new day.

A day where the sun rises and shines its radiate rays on you reminding that one should be grateful to be alive.

A day that has been written in His book of life where our stories are set on stone.

A day that is precious because we live with every heartbeat that pounds within our chest. The fragile heart that the Lord has placed in us so that, He can fill His love that overflows and spills.

His love is passionate and compassionate.

His love is unbearable and incomprehensible.

Being loved by Him, the One who came down to earth and walked on this earth as a man of flesh and bone, came to love US and to spread His love and truth about US.

Lord, you are passionate about your children, the sons and daughters of a King.

The One who reigns, saves and LOVES.

When you feel defeated…

When you feel defeated, know that God is with you.

When you feel defeated, know that you have already been risen from victory in Jesus name.

When you feel defeated, Jesus is holding your hand so that you’ll feel His presence.

When you feel defeated, know that Jesus is the only one you can depend on.

He is the one who conquered death and rose again.

He is the one who conquered sin and saved us so that we may have salvation.

He is the one who resurrected so that we may spend eternity with Him.

He is the one who defeated the enemy in all his ways so that we may continually be forgiven for our flesh.

He is the one who saves and continues to save us from a path of destruction that leads us on a way of sinfulness.

Jesus poured His blood for us on a cross that is a symbol of His sacrifice and love.

Through His eyes we are seen with beauty and worth.

He is the only one who loves us like no other being. How could we not love Him?

His love is a continuously flow of overwhelming love that has no end.

And, every day with Him is a new page of life that brings joy because I now live for HIM.